Cherokee Sage Woman

Seems life is all about change.. hence, my background (to the blog) has changed at Dan's request. The black background was messing with his visual prowess. And I think the green has a more 'sage-y' appearance anyway.

I once read that the only thing that is unchanging about life is 'change'. If things aren't flowing, they're stagnating. And so we should welcome that chaotic 'flutter-in-the-chest' bedlam of feelings that precedes change in our lives. Uh huh.. tell that to yourself when you feel as though you're standing on a cliff with a charging bear at your back. Some changes are more welcome than others.

I grew up in a wondeful era of the '50's. For all intents & purposes, it indeed was the 'Happy Days'. We all knew a Richey Cunningham, & we all lusted for the bad boy 'Fonz'. All the drugs were in New York City, far away from the pastoral setting of Oklahoma City. Everyone agreed that the fast girls were the ones smoking in the bathrooms, & we just didn't associate with them. We all wanted to be cheerleaders, sing in the glee club, & wear the quarterback's letterman's jacket.
We had our 'school' friends, our 'church' friends, & our neighborhood pals. Seldom did the trio intersect. It's just how things were.. social segregation of a sort.

I was number 6 of 8 children. A rather nice place to be actually. I got out of a lot of chores by blending into the woodwork & knowing the best hiding places. My older brothers and sisters were starting to marry by the time I became cognizant of familial place & issues.. so I tended to think of them as aunts & uncles. My closest allies were the 2 sisters who came after me. Time has been the great equalizer, & all my brothers & sisters are friends & family by now.
We were raised in a Pentecostal church, mostly Assemblies of God, or Churches of God. Always charismatic. I enjoyed it.. lots of emotional release, socialization, good music, & certainly the teachings were simply black & white.
I started teaching Sunday School when I was 17. Let me tell you, those 3 yr olds can curl your hair with their prayer requests! "Pray for my mommy, 'cause daddy punched her in the nose last night." (this from the deacon's child)
Having a problem with the word 'no', I started teaching children's church, and a teen-age girls group, attended a women's group within the church, sang in a trio, went to every revival meeting, special service, gave to missions, etc etc.. My church was my life, literally.
Then 'WHAP!' change enters into the fray. And my marriage of 17 yrs went kapoot. Well, crap happens, right? And at least I had the good people of the church to console me. Not so quickly there! Turns out that divorced women couldn't hold a position in the church & I was politely asked to surrender all my classes. Hmmmm.. What Would Jesus Do, indeed.
I grieved for my loss for awhile.. tried to find a similar place in other branches of religion.. but nothing clicked.
I was having a tearful moment at work one evening, lamenting my fate with the loss of husband, church, family. When a young intern talked with me about 'taking my power back' (ME? Power??) and handed me the book 'Illusions' by Richard Bach. Thus beginning my spiritual search into Metaphysics and all things mystical. When I look back now, it's with a sentimental eye.. I don't want to judge what I went through as hardship & dogma. I try to think of it as a foundation that I built on.
I never want to stop 'seeking'and learning.. I love my journey. And it continues to lead in depths & heights I never fathomed.

Life is about change.. scary/extraordinary/gentle/heart-thumping/natural/paranormal/liberating change!
Let it go.. let it flow.. dance the dream.. enjoy the flight.
And so it is..